Picture this: a child is hugging the family Labrador tightly. The dog responds by yawning and licking its nose. The parents smile tenderly: “Oh, he must be tired and is giving her a kiss!”. But an experienced dog behaviourist sees something entirely different: the dog isn’t tired, he’s under intense stress and desperately trying to say, “Please stop, I’m not comfortable.” This gap in perception – between what we think the dog is doing and what he’s actually feeling – is at the root of many behavioural problems. Dogs “talk” constantly, but we often fail to understand their language. It’s a body language made up of dozens of subtle signals. Understanding these signals is the key to building trust and preventing conflict; more on this at Tvaryny.
We tend to notice only the “loud” signals – barking, growling or, in the worst case, a bite. But these displays are always preceded by a whole cascade of quiet “warnings”. These are the stress and calming signals. Learning about them won’t just improve your relationship with your pet; it could literally save someone from injury and your dog from fatal consequences.
What are “calming signals” and why are they misleading?
The term “Calming Signals” was popularised by Norwegian dog trainer Turid Rugaas. It is a set of postures, gestures, and expressions that dogs use to communicate with each other and with us. Their main goal is to avoid conflict, calm the situation, or signal their own discomfort.
Why are they misleading? Because many of these actions look like normal, “human” or everyday gestures:
- Yawning (we think: tiredness).
- Licking (we think: hunger, a kiss).
- Looking away (we think: inattention, stubbornness).
When a dog uses these signals, he is basically saying, “I’m not a threat” or “I’m uncomfortable here, please increase the distance.” But the main problem is that these very same signals are also involuntary manifestations of stress. A dog might yawn not just to “calm” someone, but also because its cortisol levels are rising due to a confusing or unpleasant situation. Reading these signals correctly depends entirely on the context.
7 key stress and calming signals in dogs
Let’s break down the most common signals that owners either ignore or misinterpret. This is the alphabet of dog body language.
1. Yawning (not from tiredness)
Of course, dogs yawn when they wake up or are getting ready for bed. But a “stress” yawn is completely different. It is usually more intense and prolonged than a sleepy one.
When you see it: Most often at the vet’s surgery, at the groomer’s, when you’re hugging him too tightly, or during training if the dog doesn’t understand what you want. This is one of the first and most common signals that the dog is feeling mild to moderate stress and is trying to “release tension”.
2. Licking the nose and lips (tongue flick)
This isn’t the case of a dog licking his chops waiting for dinner. It is a very fast, barely noticeable flick of the tongue that touches the nose (sometimes just flicking out into the air). This gesture is called a “tongue flick”.
When you see it: When you lean over the dog (this is perceived as a threat), when you try to take his picture, or when a stranger reaches out to him. This is a classic calming signal, meaning: “I feel pressured, please don’t.”
3. “Whale eye” (showing the whites of the eyes)
This is one of the most serious signals on this list, indicating strong fear or stress. The dog turns its head away, but its gaze remains locked on the “threat” (e.g., your hand reaching for its bowl). The whites of the eyes become clearly visible in a crescent shape.
When you see it: During resource guarding (food, a toy, their bed), when the dog is cornered, or when a child tries to hug him and he can’t get away. This precedes a growl or a bite. If you see “whale eye” – immediately stop what you’re doing and give the dog space.
4. Turning the head and averting the gaze
This is the canine equivalent of a polite refusal. When a dog turns its head or avoids direct eye contact, it is not a sign of stubbornness or disobedience. It is an active calming signal.
When you see it: When a stranger tries to stroke him, when another dog is sniffing him too intrusively, or when you are telling him off. Direct eye contact is a challenge in the dog world. By looking away, the dog is saying, “I don’t want conflict.” Ignoring this signal and “forcing” the dog into contact (e.g., holding their face) is a direct path to escalation.
5. Raised front paw
No, this isn’t always a hunting dog’s ‘point’ (though it originates from there). A slight lift of one front paw, often combined with other signals (like a nose lick), is a sign of uncertainty and mild stress.
When you see it: During training, when the dog is unsure of the command. When he encounters something new and confusing (a strange object on the pavement). When he’s assessing the situation and doesn’t know how to act. It’s a signal of “I’m not sure about this.”
6. The “shake off” (not when wet)
The dog has just left the vet’s surgery and… shakes off, even though he’s completely dry. Or two dogs had a tense meeting, parted ways, and both shook off. This isn’t hygiene. It is a physical way to “shake off” accumulated tension and stress. It’s like breathing out “Phew, that’s done with!”.
When you see it: Always after a stressful event: after a tense game, after you’ve told him off, after guests visit. It’s a good sign – the dog is self-regulating. But it’s also an indicator that the previous situation was stressful for him.
7. Freezing
This is the most dangerous signal on the list. Freezing is a complete stop in movement. The dog suddenly becomes still, tense, its gaze fixed. This can last a split second or several seconds.
When you see it: This happens immediately before an explosion – a growl, a lunge, or a bite. A child pulls the dog’s tail, he endures it (yawning, licking), then suddenly freezes… and the next moment, he bites. Freezing is a sign that all previous “polite” signals were ignored, and the dog has switched to “fight or flight” mode (and often chooses “fight”). This is a red flag. Stop all interaction immediately.
The Ladder of Aggression: Why ignoring “quiet” signals is dangerous
Imagine a ladder. At the bottom are the mildest stress signals in dogs, and at the top is a bite. A dog always climbs these rungs sequentially. He doesn’t jump from the first to the tenth.
- Rung 1: Yawning, nose licking, looking away (Mild stress).
- Rung 2: “Whale eye”, raised paw, moving away (Moderate stress, desire to leave).
- Rung 3: Freezing, tense body (High stress).
- Rung 4: Growling (Clear warning: “Back off!”).
- Rung 5: Snapping (air snap) (Final warning).
- Rung 6: Bite.
The problem is that many owners punish the dog for Rung 4 (growling). They shout, “Don’t you dare growl!”. The dog learns the lesson: “Growling is not allowed.” And the next time, to avoid punishment, he jumps from Rung 3 (Freezing) straight to Rung 6 (Bite). This is how dogs that “bite without warning” are created. In reality, they did warn, but their warnings (calming signals and growling) were suppressed. Your job is to react back on Rung 1.
By punishing a dog for growling, you are taking the batteries out of the smoke alarm while the house is on fire.
Common Scenarios: Where do we see these signals most often?
Understanding the theory is one thing, but how to understand your dog in real life? Pay attention to these signals in these situations:
- During hugs and kisses: Most dogs hate hugs (it is perceived as confinement) and close-up, direct eye contact. Look at photos of “dog and child hugging” – in 90% of cases, you’ll see “whale eye”, yawning, or nose licking.
- At the vet’s waiting room: This place is a symphony of stress signals. Yawning, licking, raised paws, trembling.
- When meeting other dogs: Turning the head, “freezing” on approach, sniffing in an arc (not head-on) – these are all elements of polite canine etiquette to avoid conflict.
- During training sessions: If you’re applying too much pressure or the commands are unclear, the dog will start to yawn, lick, and look away. This isn’t stubbornness; it’s overload.
- When guests come round: New people, loud noises – the dog might hide, but if he has nowhere to go, he will start giving these signals, asking for space.
My dog is showing these signals. What should I do?
So, you’ve noticed your dog yawns when a guest strokes him, or shows “whale eye” when you approach his bowl. Your actions (and what NOT to do) are critical.
- DO NOT punish the signal. Never scold a dog for yawning, licking, or growling. It’s his only way of telling you he’s uncomfortable. By taking that away, you’re creating a ticking time bomb.
- STOP the action IMMEDIATELY. If you’re stroking the dog and he turns his head – remove your hand. If a guest is crowding the dog and he licks his lips – ask the guest to move away. If you see “whale eye” by the bowl – step back.
- Create distance. Your first goal is to lower the stress level. The best way to do this is to give the dog space. Let him walk away, move away yourself, redirect his attention to something calm.
- Anaylse the trigger. What exactly caused the reaction? Your hand over his head? Eye contact? A loud noise? By understanding the cause, you can avoid it in future or begin slow desensitisation (counter-conditioning).
- Contact a professional. If you often see high-stress signals (freezing, “whale eye”, growling), especially related to resource guarding or fear, don’t try to fix it yourself. Contact a certified dog behaviourist or a veterinary behaviourist who uses humane methods.
Conclusion: Learn to ‘Listen’
Dog body language is a rich and complex system, but it is completely logical. Your dog doesn’t want to bite you. He doesn’t want conflict. He wants to be heard. Every yawn, every nose lick isn’t just physiology – it is a sentence in his conversation with you.
When you learn to recognise these 7 signals and respond with respect (i.e., by giving space), two things will happen. First, you will drastically reduce the risk of aggression. Second, and most importantly, your dog will understand that you “hear” him and respect his boundaries. This is the foundation for an incredibly deep trust and bond that will last a lifetme.